For future reference the male colleague I reported will be called Nick.
So last Friday, after putting up with sexist crap day in day out, I finally decided to report a male colleague (Nick) to my manager. This wasn’t the first time I had reported him. The first time was at the beginning of December. We had been arguing about trying to get our work done quicker (we have a time limit to build machines in) and I called him childish. Well he didn’t like this and he raised his hand to me as if he was going to hit me.
I called him out on this, saying very loudly so another colleague could hear, “You were going to hit me then, do you think that’s an ok thing to do?” That seemed to rile him further because he did it again, only this time he actually followed through with it and hit my arm. He didn’t hit me hard, but I still felt it and he left an angry red mark on my arm.
I went straight to my sub team leader, who then told my manager. We were both called in to talk about it and explain it. Nick protested his innocence, saying it wasn’t even that hard and I shouldn’t say he hit me. My manager didn’t care and told him under no circumstance was he to touch me, whether it was to hit me or just to touch my arm. Nick apologised and that was that. He ignored me after that and didn’t speak to me again until after we came back from Christmas.
However, since then, I have had to put up with an unending amount of bullshit. He does things to purposefully piss me off, but then sometimes he will say things and I don’t think he realises how inappropriate or offending they are. He will comment on my weight, saying I’m getting bigger or smaller. Over Christmas I lost a huge amount of weight because I was really ill, I have managed to put that weight back on as healthily as I can, but when he makes comments about my weight, it only makes me more self-conscious.
I also work with my auntie and he says things to her that she lets him get away with, mostly because she just lets them go over her head. But I work more closely with him, and every day he will say something that offends me or upsets me. A little while ago another colleague, who is black, was walking past, Nick turned round to me and said “Look at that gorilla, shall we throw it a banana?” I couldn’t believe what he had just said, I told my sub team leader and she warned him not to say things like that again.
But he doesn’t learn his lesson. This week, I decided that everything he said or did that offended or upset me, I would write down in a little book. On Monday he asked me how I would feel if I got knocked up by a N****r. On Tuesday he decided to discuss whether I still had my “V-plates.”
On Wednesday, as I was bending down to pick something up, he looked down my top and said “nice bra.” He also told me that when we were on a works trip, he and another male colleague stared at my underwear which was poking out of my jeans.
On Friday we were talking about male and female privileges, he didn’t seem to like my opinion and so started hitting a wall. I asked him if I had annoyed him, he said I had and he was imagining the wall was me, whilst continuing to hit it.
I was done. I’d officially had enough. I was no longer going to feel uncomfortable or threatened at work. I went straight to my manager and told him. I showed him the book in which I had written everything. He couldn’t believe the amount of things that were in there. He called the manager of the agency and we had a chat. They then spoke to Nick about what had been going on and he apologised.
My manager has told me he will be keeping a close eye on Nick and if anything happens, I can go straight to him and he will sort it. I’m glad my manager has taken it seriously, but I hate the fact I still have to work with this guy. I just have to keep going until the next thing happens.